Alkemia Carmen 7 Review

Brand: Alkemia
Availability: General Catalog
Notes: Spiced Pear, Lychee Fruit, Praline, Vanilla, Magnolia, and Amber

First impression out of bottle: Fruit, musk, amber. Fresh and girlish.

Freshly applied: A beautiful soft feminine vanilla pops out and amber becomes more prominent. It’s starting to smell like a mainstream amber-vanilla blend (not in a bad way.) 

Drydown: The white florals are unfurling and there’s a sugared undercurrent that I think is the praline note mingled with the amber/vanilla. The fruits are also there now but it’s 30% fruity-floral and 70% vanilla-amber-sweetness. Very balanced. I love the magnolia in this. Overall, I’m reminded of some kind of sexy scent from Victoria’s Secret, only it’s more sophisticated and high quality. The amber is a very “clean” one and it smells of washed and powdered skin, not too sweet and a bit fresh. Almost like a clean cotton scent, but without the screechy laundry-detergent feel of that type of note. Reminds me of the "baby" undertone of certain Johnson & Johnson products, but NOT like baby oil. It really reminds me of that lavender baby body wash/lotion they sell in the purple bottle. 

Something fresh, clean, and comforting

After several hours: Complex sweet muskiness. 

Longevity: Medium high
Sillage: Medium high

Would an [X] lover love this? I think if you enjoy mainstream fruity-floral perfumes, or anything in the warm/amber/vanilla family, you will love this. Especially if you find yourself loving on some mainstream sweet/girly scents from the likes of Victoria's Secret or Bath & Body Works. It’s not strongly lychee or pear, so look elsewhere for true fruit scents of that nature. 

Would an [X] hater love this? If you are generally opposed to sweet, girlish scents, this might turn you off. If you exclusively wear witchy, dark stuff, this won’t appeal. But I like both dark AND light things, and this is a perfect, non-cloying girly scent. Great for any friends who are not yet inducted into the creepy-fun world of indie perfume and would want something non-threatening and beautiful. Also great as a stocking stuffer for younger friends or family, as it’s not Baby Prostitute perfume, but would be appropriate for anybody from the ages of 13 onward.

Where am I? I  feel like Gisele shooting a perfume commercial, wrapped in flattering golden pink lighting.

Where would I wear this? Daytime, weekend, probably out to dinner even because it's kind of sexy in a non-sexual way. Girly and super pretty.

Deconstructing Eden These Are the Days of Wine and Honey Review

Brand: Deconstructing Eden
Availability: General Catalog
Notes: The last of the sunflowers, rich honey and beeswax, tolu balsam, tonka bean, cedar, liatrix, palo santo wood, elemi essential oil, silky musk and of course, a splash of wine

First impression out of bottle: Dark sweetness

Freshly applied: Grape cough syrup/Flintstones vitamins

Drydown: Mm this is kind of swelling up and getting more voluptuous. DE scents tend to do that if they smell sharp at first. I'm getting a bit of citrus, a REALLY silky musk that smells almost like velvet, some woodsy brown notes, a bit of tobacco (liatrix is in the tobacco family), and a very sweet pinky red wine note. I can't say this reads super honeyed to me. It's more warm, golden, and like fresh beeswax. 

After several hours: This scent smells very reddish-pink to me like a beautiful sunset. The harsh grape notes are gone and it's a pinky red golden scent, like warm fabric and smooth wine. This scent is languorous, luxurious, sexy in a bohemian way without relying on spice, incense, or patchouli. 

Longevity: High
Sillage: Medium

Would an [X] lover love this? If you love wine scents, this is a really special, not-too-literal sweet wine scent with great honey and wood accents.

Would an [X] hater love this? I think even if you're not a huge fan of alcoholic or wine scents, this captures the warmth and color of a glass of wine without the harshness or the weirdness of wearing a scent inspired by alcohol.

Where am I? Lying in a field of warm golden grass, surrounded by friends drinking and eating.

Where would I wear this? Daytime, nighttime, summer, autumn, weekend. Probably not work although it doesn't actually smell like wine. But it gives me a really calm, afternoon-nap feeling which is not optimal for a workday.

Deconstructing Eden Haunted Review

Brand: Deconstructing Eden
Availability: General Catalog
Notes: Ghostly roses, ethereal lilacs and wisteria. Pale, pale Asian lilies on a soft bed of delicate woods and ambergris.

First impression out of bottle: Ladylike lilies and lilac

Freshly applied: Very lush white lilies. My dad hates the scent of lilies because they remind him of funerals, but I don't necessarily have that association. To me, lilies are very rich but also very clean. They remind me of expensive hotel bathrooms. 

Drydown: Yep, still a bit bathroom-y. I don't think it's super soapy necessarily, but that clean scent just makes me think of bathrooms. I get the lilac and the wisteria, but I think those aren't helping the issue. It's a little old lady-ish but also a little soapy/not rich enough. It's not really giving me a ghostly impression, it's just like a ritzy hotel powder room.

After several hours: Same white clean floral lily scent.

Longevity: High
Sillage: High

Would an [X] lover love this? I think if you love the scent of lilies, you will really enjoy this. I love wisteria and lilac but they don't save the fragrance for me.

Would an [X] hater love this? I think if you are not a fan of funereal type flowers, this will definitely offend your sensibilities.

Where am I? Pink ladies' powder room.

Where would I wear this? To have afternoon tea. Daytime, spring, summer.

Deconstructing Eden Theodora Review

Brand: Deconstructing Eden
Availability: General Catalog
Notes: Bulgarian rose absolute, Indian jasmine absolute, sandalwood, dragon's blood, frankincense, purple plums, Madagascar ginger, and precious spices

First impression out of bottle: Fruity Dragon's Blood

Freshly applied: Dragon's Blood, berries, and a hint of ginger and whiskey (sometimes DE scents with spice in them smell like whiskey on me!)

Drydown: Unfortunately, this is one of the DE scents that first takes a funky turn on me. There are very few but this is similar to Jasmine House, which turned to straight coriander and whiskey on me. I have a very similar impression from the initial drydown of Theodora. 

After several hours: So the nice thing about DE scents is even when they don't work on me, the drydown is always fabulous. In this case, it doesn't take too long (maybe 5 min) for the scent to morph out of its SPICED WHISKEY loudmouth opening into something far tamer. This turns into a slightly alcoholic (like wine and maybe a hint of brandy) purple-fruit incense scent. Dragon's Blood usually smells "red" and "dry" to me but here it smells VERY purple and almost damp and juicy. I don't get a lot of individual rose or jasmine, but I do smell a faint floral background. I definitely smell a bit of fresh ginger, which is a really nice addition. This is not overwhelmingly incense (maybe 40-50%) and it doesn't smell smoky or powdery. Just very smooth and sexy. 

Longevity: High
Sillage: Medium

Would an [X] lover love this? I think incense and plum/berry lovers will really enjoy this. It's not too juicy, not too dry, just perfect.

Would an [X] hater love this? Even if you think you dislike incense or Dragon's Blood, give this a try. I prefer Nag Champa to Dragon's Blood but this blend won me over. Sometimes the note can be too dry, too musky, but this is a very elegant and sexy version.

Where am I? A dimly lit purple tent filled with fruit, incense, and booze

Where would I wear this? Weekend, daytime, nighttime, autumn, winter, spring, summer. I think I might wear this at work but it's not really a work-mood kind of scent. I would put this on to lounge at home but also to go out on a nice date.

Deconstructing Eden Halo Review

Brand: Deconstructing Eden

Availability: General Catalog
Notes: Moonlight, sea water, lilacs, wisteria, honeysuckle and moonflower

First impression out of bottle: Bumble & Bumble Surf Spray 

Freshly applied: Light fluffy lilac plus that same beachy expensive hair product scent. 

Fragrant soft lilacs with ocean breeze

Drydown: Sweet delicate lilacs and maybe something sweeter like alyssum or osmanthus, along with that sweet relaxing surf spray smell. This is not a kelpy/true earthy beach smell. It is not sandy or sunscreen-y. It smells identical to that B&B hair product. A perfumey/luxurious interpretation of "beach."

After several hours: Same as drydown. Something I love about DE's floral mixes is that on the drydown, you'll get one aspect (beachy) popping out more strongly, but then it backs down and the floral aspect (lilac) comes forward. And it sort of weaves in and out and you get a very interesting sensory experience!

Longevity: High
Sillage: Medium

Would an [X] lover love this? I think someone who loves lilacs would really enjoy this, because it's somehow a TRUE lilac scent but with something a little different and beachy. It doesn't smell..tropical or like jasmine or anything. But it smells like flowering lilac bushes by the seaside.

Would an [X] hater love this? I think haters of beachy or lilac scents will still find this sweet rendition wearable. The lilac isn't cloying or powdery, it's got the soft roundness of real lilac blossoms, but a certain freshness that makes the perfume very "easy on the nose."

Where am I? Getting my hair cut in an absurdly upscale and relaxing salon. I'm almost crying because this is the exact scent memory of the first/grownup haircut I got. I was just starting to get out of my awkward middle school phase and I had my hair cut short and adorable before going on a shopping trip with my mom. This smells like the hair salon + the Lanvin perfume she bought me that day (Éclat d'Arpège.) It smells like sunny weather, happiness, and youth. 

Where would I wear this? Definitely a summer/spring scent. It evokes weekends and vacation for me, but I would absolutely wear it to work to brighten my spirits.

Deconstructing Eden Alice in Wonderland Review

Brand: Deconstructing Eden
Availability: General Catalog
Notes: Candied lemon peel and sugared violet and rose petals

First impression out of bottle: Floral marshmallows

Freshly applied: Floral marshmallows with a citrus twist

Pretty much exactly this

Drydown: Powdered sugar with a hint of flowers and lemon. This is a really great floral gourmand. I like it far better than Solstice Scents Violet Mallow, which is insanely sharp and a bit grassy on the opening. This is like the slightly purpler version of Solstice Scents Rose Mallow Cream. But where that has a very vanilla-marshmallow quality, this is more like powdered sugar marshmallow fluff. The violet is quiet and very well behaved here. It's melded with the rose into some sort of fantasy flower that smells like both and neither. 

Something fluffy and powdery (in a good way)

After several hours: Sweet powdered sugar and flowers with a gooooorgeous sweet candy lemon. The violet becomes way more "violet"y after drying down more and smells a bit purplish. Still well-behaved, but the scent reminds me of those violet candies from Italy. More violet than rose on the drydown.

Such a sweet, perfect lemon

Longevity: High
Sillage: Medium

Would an [X] lover love this? Gourmand lovers would really like it. I think fans of Solstice Scents' Mallow blends will enjoy this different spin on a candied floral scent. There's really no vanilla in this, which I think makes it different and interesting. Violet lovers will enjoy the tamed and lovely violet.

Would an [X] hater love this? Gourmand haters will probably find this too fluffy. Violet-haters (I count myself among you) will probably actually be fine with it. The violet is totally tolerable and not sharp or grassy. It actually works with the scent instead of competing with the other notes, which is often something I dislike about violets.

Where am I? Having an elegant tea party with a bunch of rich children

Where would I wear this? Daytime, afternoon, girl's day out, weekend. It's a bit too sweet for work, but it's perfect to wear out shopping or something. Springy/summery. 

Sarawen The Piemaker Review

Brand: Sarawen
Availability: General Catalog
Notes: berry pies, pale musk, apple spice, tuberose, amber

First impression out of bottle: Red berries and white florals

Freshly applied: Stately tuberose and raspberries

Sophisticated tuberose is the loudest note at first

Drydown: Very good but faint light red berry note, non-obnoxious tuberose, and a large dose of a generic perfume smell. It sucks because I like all the elements alone here, but together they are turning bland. Nothing is offensive (surprising, considering how nasty berry notes can go, and ditto for tuberose) but I expected a more exuberant, unusual end result. It's basically a light and inoffensive tuberose perfume with a faintly fruity undertone. I get no spice or heavier gourmand (pie crust etc) notes. 

After several hours: All gourmand notes are gone, but maybe a hint of berry remains as a pink tone to the tuberose.

Longevity: Low
Sillage: Low medium. I was expecting something more powerful- you've got powerhouse tuberose and some heavy gourmand notes up in here but it turns out a bit watery, which is the worst.

Would an [X] lover love this? Gourmand-floral lovers (of which I am one) may like it if their skin chemistry is right. I personally disliked it, as the reason I enjoy gourmand-florals is that they are unusual and funky. This smells generically floral. 

Would an [X] hater love this? If you have been curious about white florals but find them all heavy and cloying, AND you like very subtle scents, you may enjoy this. 

Where am I? Sitting in an empty dance hall after the flowers and cakes have been cleared from a wedding. Mostly empty air with a hint of fruit and flowers.

Where would I wear this? Daytime, work, weekend, summer, spring. It's too light for me to enjoy regularly. 

Sarawen Georgina Review

Brand: Sarawen
Availability: General Catalog
Notes: peach, black tea, mint, incense

First impression out of bottle: Airy florals with a hint of dark tea

Freshly applied: Fruity tea cough drop

Drydown: As it dries, some fresh mintiness peeks out from what was initially peachy tea. It's definitely more full-bodied than a plain tea scent would be, and the incense is making it more soft and round. The incense definitely has a pale Nag Champa feel- not hot/red like Dragon's Blood. Also not a smoky scent at all. The fresh mint leaf mixes so nicely with the incense. The peach is more like peach skin- I don't get juiciness or obvious fruitiness. Just sweet fuzziness.

The essence of fuzzy peach skin

After several hours: Ultimately it's a really lovely soft peach scent. The incense and mint/tea are supporting it but it's all fuzzy voluptuous (but innocent) peach. So cuddly.

Like this blanket

Longevity: Medium.
Sillage: Low. I would really enjoy this if it were a more robust scent. I think the peach/tea fresh notes and the incense are a good mix, but it's not punchy enough.

Would an [X] lover love this? I think anyone who likes incense or fresh scents will love this. Especially if you have really loud skin chemistry that amps everything. Because then maybe it'll last longer on you! 

Would an [X] hater love this? I think even someone who despises incense or fruity notes could get on board with this. It's so nicely blended and maybe because it's whisper-soft it's easy to wear? I wish it were stronger. 

Where am I? Rubbing my face on a peach

Where would I wear this? Bed, daytime, work. I don't know if I want a full-size because who wants to bother wearing a scent they can't smell? Then again if I had a bigger bottle maybe I could slather and get a stronger effect?

Cocoa Pink Caramel Popcorn Balls Review

Brand: Cocoa Pink
Availability: General Catalog Autumn/Winter (N/A in Spring/Summer)
Notes: Melted marshmallow buttery caramel popcorn balls, a delicious Halloween treat sure to evoke memories of childhood.

First impression out of bottle: Butter and alcohol

Freshly applied: Salty butter and fruity candy like Pez or Sweet Tarts

Drydown: Toasted, almost woodsy marshmallows with a hint of savoryness. Not butter, but more like Rice Krispies. Not a gooey caramel scent, more fluffy, toasty, and golden.

After several hours: Lovely soft marshmallow with a hint of toasted savory flavor. I like this and it's nowhere near as buttery or weird as I expected. Not caramel-y though.

Definitely smells like these guys.

Longevity: Medium
Sillage: Low-medium

Would an [X] lover love this? I don't own it but from what I've heard, this could be similar to HoG Ghost Puffs. If you enjoy slightly kooky gourmands you will like this. 

Would an [X] hater love this? Gourmand hater or someone who picks up on buttery/salty notes to an extreme might find this weird. But then again as it's in EDP format I think the buttery popcorn notes will be very chilled out in general, even on people with wacky skin chemistry.

Where am I? Eating Rice Krispie treats at a Girl Scouts meeting after school.

Where would I wear this? Daytime, weekend. This is a little subtle for me for wintertime, when I prefer heavy spiced scents, but it could be good for the summer.

Cocoa Pink Twist of Lime Noel Review

Brand: Cocoa Pink
Availability: General Catalog 
Notes: Twist of lime blended with VBN.

First impression out of bottle: Sweet lime candy

Freshly applied: Sweet lime with beautifully fluffy vanilla

Drydown: Same sweet, candied lime with fluffy Vanilla Bean Noel. I love this! It's a perfect sweet lime scent. I had tried Lime Sugar and it was too astringent and sharp. Key Lime Clouds was too fluffy and not lime-y enough. This is what I wanted Key Lime Clouds to be! Hnng I really love the VBN note, because it's deep enough to be interesting and a bit caramely, but not so deep as to be smoky or sexy. It's still a very youthful, daytime-appropriate note.

Key lime marshmallows

After several hours: Vanilla fluff with a hint of key lime

Longevity: High
Sillage: Medium- I find some of the VBN blends to be a little lower in sillage. They don't scream as loudly but they do linger a long time.

Would an [X] lover love this? Lime or vanilla/marshmallow lovers would go crazy for this. If you have ever looked for a key lime scent with no crust/graham cracker, then this is it!

Would an [X] hater love this? This avoids the pitfalls of lime. It's not super zesty, sour, or cleaning-product-like. I find it super pleasant and easy to wear, and if you hate lime, this might change your mind.

Where am I? Making fancy marshmallows for someone's summer wedding.

Where would I wear this? This is definitely a summer scent to me. It is light enough for hot weather and the notes are perfect for summertime. I don't think I will wear this in the Winter, but I will DEFINITELY break it out come spring. Good for work or for weekend/date stuff!

Cocoa Pink Snowflakes Review

Brand: Cocoa Pink
Availability: General Catalog Autumn/Winter (N/A in Spring/Summer)
Notes: Sparkling mounds of fluffy almond icing snow dusted with soft white sugars.

First impression out of bottle: Gourmand plastic

Freshly applied: Almond extract and sunscreen

Drydown: This is quite a good sweet pure almond. It's not pastry-like at all. It reminds me a lot of almond granita, which you can get in Italy. Sweet, not creamy, but not too icy. There's still the eensiest bit of plastic/sunscreen which is in some Cocoa Pink gourmands, but nothing overwhelming.

Almond Italian ice

After several hours: The plastickyness is gone now, whew! Sweet pure almond. A little more sugary now, like maybe there's almond royal icing on top of the granita.

Longevity: High
Sillage: Medium

Would an [X] lover love this? I think an almond lover would appreciate this for being both a true almond scent and NOT a super-sharp almond. 

Would an [X] hater love this? Meh, almond haters might enjoy it but then again the initial plasticky note could be a big turnoff. One selling point for haters is that it quickly loses that almond extract note that can be so offensive.

Where am I? Scraping up almond Italian ice with a little spoon, savoring the treat at the end of a long meal.

Where would I wear this? This is definitely a daytime perfume for me. It feels equally appropriate for cold or warm weather, because almond is a year round scent for me! I would wear this to work, but I also think strong almonds have quite a sexy feel, so I would wear it out at night too!

Cocoa Pink Buttermint Candy Review

Brand: Cocoa Pink
Availability: General Catalog Autumn/Winter (N/A in Spring/Summer)
Notes: crisp clean peppermint with hints of vanilla bean.

First impression out of bottle: Not super sweet peppermint

Freshly applied: Breathtakingly cold  peppermint. Hint of something a bit plasticky.
Drydown: Still the same cold mint. That feeling you get in your lungs when you're running and it's freezing outside, and it feels like your lungs are icing over. The plastickyness is gone, but unfortunately I don't get a whole lot of vanilla bean. 

Very cold mint...brrr.

After several hours: I get just a hint of the vanilla bean now but it's still quite unsweetened. Definitely not a sugary scent or an ice cream scent. I would say breathmint is an accurate description. Not so much a buttermint, which I think of as sweeter. 

Longevity: High. 
Sillage: Medium high. It really freezes your nostrils when you take a whiff, like real peppermint.

Would an [X] lover love this? Mint lovers might like it, though it's quite plain, so if you have a lot of minty perfumes already, this would only be good for layering purposes or something. I think it could intensify the existing mint notes in any perfumes you own.

Would an [X] hater love this? Mint haters will probably despise this. It's cold and green and bracing- all characteristics of mint they are probably not a fan of.

Where am I? Popping a breathmint on a freezing cold snowy morning.

Where would I wear this? Work, anytime I needed to wake up fast. It's very energizing. It's NOT a candy cane-ish mint, so I would wear this in the spring or summer too. 

Cocoa Pink Tahitian Monoi Cake Review

Brand: Cocoa Pink
Availability: General Catalog
Notes: Vanilla cake batter injected with candied citrus, moist white cake smothered in whipped buttercream icing touched with nuances of Polynesian Monoi oil.

First impression out of bottle: Buttered white toast (huh?)

Freshly applied: Buttery pound cake and white florals

Drydown: This is SO not a delicate pale white cake scent. This is a brash yellow pound cake, heavy on the butter and super rich in scent and feel. There is a touch of candied citrus I think, but it makes me think more of like...kumquat or something more tropical than standard lemon. It's not a citrus-y scent overall. The white florals/Monoi are so pretty and SO weird combined with the cake. Someone reviewed this and said it was weirdly great and it straddled the line between gourmand and floral and they were so right. It doesn't smell like...flowers on a cake...or cake infused with flowers. It smells exactly 50/50 real Monoi oil with luscious gourmand cake.

The cake element smells like this picture

After several hours: More of the same, though I'd say the Monoi has now taken the wheel and this is a predominantly floral scent with nuances of buttery gourmand notes. Honestly this is a total weirdo of a scent. It makes me think of a sweet girl who is totally crazy and who can be fun but a lot of trouble. 

Very realistic fresh monoi oil

Longevity: High
Sillage: High

Would an [X] lover love this?  If you like cakes and florals you might like it, but it's not as friendly as SS Cameo or something similar. It's a little odd and it might be unsettling. Think more of the weirdness of SS Nightgown. You can't quite land on if it's food or flowers. I do adore white florals when the moon is right (literally, white florals smell better to me at some points in my cycle) so I will hang onto this.

Would an [X] hater love this? If you hate white florals or cake this is probably going to weird you out and it definitely won't convert you.

Where am I? I'm a weirdo on a tropical vacation.

Yep, basically Rayanne if she ever went on an island vacation

Where would I wear this? I might wear this as a daytime scent but then again, it's a little kooky. I think this would be easier for me to use in a bath & body application. I don't know if I want to smell like this all day.

Cocoa Pink Green Apple Noel Review

Brand: Cocoa Pink
Availability: General Catalog Autumn/Winter (N/A in Spring/Summer)
Notes: Sweet, juicy crisp granny smith apples with lashings of vanilla bean noel

First impression out of bottle: Sweet vanilla (most Cocoa Pink EDPs smell strongly of alcohol and not much else in the bottle, this is not a good indicator of what happens on the skin, as the alcohol scent dissipates very quickly.)

Freshly applied: Bright green apple, like the type in caramel apple lollipops.

Drydown: Same bright green candy apple with hints of soft purring vanilla bean. Smells a lot like a green apple Jolly Rancher, only with a hint of something pretty and sweet. There is less vanilla in this than in Strawberry Noel, which I find is 70% vanilla 30% strawberry. This feels like it's 30% vanilla 70% apple.

After several hours: Settles to 50% apple 50% vanilla, which is fine by me. The apple quiets down a bit, and while it retains a hint of candy, it becomes a fresh green apple scent. This is nothing like Arcana Apples Crave Vanilla, but it's quite lovely. The vanilla also develops from its initial plain Jane-ness to become the fuzzy voluptuous VBN I know and love.

Becomes a more sophisticated apple candy with warm sweet vanilla

Longevity: High
Sillage: Medium

Would an [X] lover love this? Apple lovers who are ok with a candied vibe will enjoy this. Apple lovers who crave realistic/fresh fruit scents will probably not like the green apple note.

Would an [X] hater love this? I don't actually love apple scents (IMAM BETRAYAL) unless the apple is blended with a lot of heavier notes. I find something really flat and uninteresting about plain, fresh red apple in perfumes. So I think I prefer this green version, but I don't think other people with apple aversions would share this sentiment. I know a lot of people dislike apple because they find common blends to be too GREEN APPLE CANDY and this won't address that problem.

Where am I? A candy store, but a really expensive one where they make luxurious green lollipops from real apples.

Where would I wear this? Daytime, to hang out with kids because they would think I smelled awesome, warm weather, work. I think this would be amazing in a body/hair product.

Cocoa Pink Strawberry Noel Review

Brand: Cocoa Pink
Availability: General Catalog Autumn/Winter (N/A in Spring/Summer)
Notes: A perfectly balanced fresh strawberry that smells like real berries (not plasticy bubblegum strawberry), blended with VBN.

First impression out of bottle: Yummy fresh strawberries

Freshly applied: Fresh strawberries and creamy vanilla bean

Drydown: Same as above. I like the strawberry in this, it's certainly not fakey. I think the vanilla is overpowering the berry though because I get more of a berried-vanilla than a berries + vanilla vibe. 

After several hours: Still fruity vanilla. I love the vanilla in this. I prefer it to the real Vanilla Bean Noel (from Bath & Body Works) and I would say it's a hybrid of a musky vanilla like NAVA's Crystalline and a really foodie creamy vanilla like the one you find in Solstice Scents' mallow blends. With an added hint of actual vanilla bean. 

Like strawberries and vanilla cream, but light on the strawberry

Longevity: High
Sillage: Medium

Would an [X] lover love this? Vanilla lovers will like it! Cocoa Pink makes quite a few "VBN" blends, so you'd probably only choose this if you were a huge strawberry fan (I am.) The strawberry is not super unique/different, but it is realistic, which is important enough for me. 

Would an [X] hater love this? I think it's a pretty simple fruit and vanilla scent, and unless you've never smelled VBN before (or Cocoa Pink's version) you don't need to try this if you're averse to vanillic or food scents.

Where am I? I'm me as a young teenager, slathering myself with products from a giant Bath & Body Works gift basket

Where would I wear this? Daytime, weekend, spring, summer. Despite the "Noel" name, which is really just an adaptation from the B&BW winter scent, it's very much a fresh warm weather perfume!

Cocoa Pink Coconut Rum Cake Review

Brand: Cocoa Pink
Availability: General Catalog Autumn/Winter (N/A in Spring/Summer)
Notes: A scrumptious bakery arrangement beginning with almond extract, chopped almonds, and dark rum followed by sugar cane, coconut milk, vanilla extract, and heavy cream topped off with flaked coconut.

First impression out of bottle: Sharp rum and coconut

Freshly applied: Straight coconut Malibu rum

Smells like...lemon cake??

Drydown: Something kind of lemony. Almost smells like OHWTO The Cake Is a Lie. Weird! Now I get a lovely crumbly cake scent, kind of like cake covered in brown sugar. There is still a steeped-in-rum feeling and a nice tropical feel like flaked toasty coconut. I'm so confused why this smells like lemon cake though. I guess my nose could be interpreting sharpness from the rum as citrus, but it's  bit unnerving!

After several hours: The coconut becomes beautiful and silky, almost like you made an icing from coconut milk and powdered sugar. Very tropical smelling. Still smells like lemon cake!

Longevity: High
Sillage: High

Would an [X] lover love this? This is definitely a successful gourmand scent. I am bewildered by the lemon but I still enjoy this.

Would an [X] hater love this? Cake haters need not apply. This is a very sweet gourmand with prominent cake notes.

Where am I? Drinking a rum cocktail and eating lemon-coconut cake at someone's destination wedding.

Where would I wear this? Summer, daytime. Especially considering I get such a fierce lemon cake smell, this reads warm weather to me. Not like a heavy dark Christmas rum cake. Oh well!

Possets Strawberry Heart Review

Brand: Possets
Availability: General Catalog
Notes: Scrumptious strawberry untrammeled by anything other than the most perfect of vanillas.

First impression out of bottle: Synthetic watery strawberry

Freshly applied: Watery strawberry cough syrup

Drydown: Watery cough syrup. Very soft, even though I applied quite a bit.

After several hours: Aaaand it's gone.

This, but less intense

Longevity: Low
Sillage: Low

Would an [X] lover love this? A fruit lover might enjoy this- I've heard raves about it but it just dies a quick death on me.

Would an [X] hater love this? Meh if you hate fruit/berry scents don't even try this. Even if it has better throw on you than it did for me, it's very straightforward.

Where am I? Refusing to take my medicine as a child.

Where would I wear this? Nowhere.

Possets Churpz Review

Brand: Possets
Availability: General Catalog
Notes: Named after the marshmallow chicks so common at this time of year, Churpz is all fluffy puffy fun and nothing instructive, corrective, or refined. Churpz is simple all-out pleasure in things which are sweet and gooey and a mental orgasm (ed: translation- marshmallow)

First impression out of bottle: Plasticky sweetness

Freshly applied: Plasticky sweetness

Drydown: The plastic calms down and I get a really fluffy marshmallow- really just like the classic Peeps smell. Not a sophisticated, expensive vanilla marshmallow, but a puffy grocery store treat. There's almost the suggestion of fake food coloring- that not quite sweet not quite bitter trace smell. Interesting!

After several hours: Same plain synthetic (in a good way) marshmallow sweetness.

Longevity: Low
Sillage: Low- this scent barely has any throw at all

Would an [X] lover love this? A marshmallow lover might want to have this in their collection, but with the paltry throw and longevity, I'm not sure it does much for me. 

Would an [X] hater love this? I don't think even a marshmallow hater would be offended by this, because it's so damn subtle. But they wouldn't want to wear it I don't think.

Where am I? Opening a box of Peeps on Easter morning.

Where would I wear this? I wouldn't wear it unless I wanted to apply a perfume and not be able to smell it.

Possets Courtly Love Review

Brand: Possets
Availability: General Catalog
Notes: Coconut (here used more as a serious element rather than a novelty) dances with apricot and a light kiss of vanilla and a very sweet, not stinky, jasmine. 

First impression out of bottle: Apricot jam

Freshly applied: Mm this smells just like KIND bars- Apricot & Almond flavor mixed with the Almond & Coconut flavor. The apricot is  jammy on me, like semi-dried fruit with a concentrated flavor.

Smells like an overpriced fruit and nut bar

Drydown: There's now a little more "perfumey" scent, not so much the straight food scent that it was at first. The coconut pops out too, it smells very much like the coconut in the LE Silver Coconut from Possets, which is a bit musky and vanillic. Mmm now I get a really nice pure jasmine note, very soft and tropical. I think it's mingling with the coconut to give me that beachy/humid feel and I love it. Not stinky or spicy at all! The apricot is still there, but it's almost like a background note now. I love it. The apricot comes back out to play, stronger than the jasmine again and this is my favorite part of the transformation. It's a sweet, pure apricot with nutty nuances from the almond/coconut and a hint of delicate jasmine.

YES, Apricot Jasmine Macarons exist and that's exactly what this smells like

After several hours: The strongest remaining notes are the apricot and jasmine. Super delicious, swirly, and feminine. The mix of notes on the drydown almost makes me think of jasmine tea, in addition to the jasmine/apricot macarons from before. 

Longevity: High. This 
Sillage: High. This has amazing throw for a fruity-floral! Intense, sweet, floral, and powerful.

Would an [X] lover love this? Fruity-floral lovers need it. It's more unusual/unexpected than your mainstream fruity-floral but it's totally beginner-friendly.

Would an [X] hater love this? I think this could appeal to jasmine-haters but they'd need to try a sample first.

Where am I? Having a tea party in a secret garden.

Where would I wear this? This is a spring/summer scent for sure. I'd wear this to a wedding, garden party, or other romantic/girly event. It's super fun and that perfect combo of perfumey and edible that I love so much.

Long Winter Farm Unicorn Farts Review

Brand: Long Winter Farm
Availability: General Catalog
Notes: strawberry cotton candy and spearmint

First impression out of bottle: Minty fresh cotton candy

Freshly applied: This is a true perfect blend of pink cotton candy and mint. The mint doesn’t smell like a breath mint, it’s actually fused really well with the cotton candy. I get both the fluffy sugariness and the fresh minty feel. If I breathe it in more deeply, I smell the accurate crystallized spun sugar smell of cotton candy, with a hint of berry sweetness. This reminds me SO MUCH of going to Disney On Ice(!) shows as a little kid. I was obsessed with cotton candy, so I’d always share a cone with my mom, usually I got one of those commemorative character cups/containers to go with it. This smells like the memory of that cotton candy with the briskness of being in the ice skating rink. The mint tempers the cotton candy perfectly and it’s not too sweet. 

Fresh pink cotton candy with some mint

Drydown: Weirdly the smell combines and becomes the exact smell of sweetened adzuki bean paste. I love this smell, but it's certainly a weird impression to get from something as simple as mint/candy. It still smells like I described above, but if you know what red bean paste smells like, you'll think of it too.

Sweet, rich adzuki bean paste

After several hours: Basically the same, but a lot fainter

Longevity: Not very good for a cotton candy scent (which usually last forever on me.) Probably 3 hours at strong sillage, then another 2 hours at whisper-soft throw.
Sillage: At first, medium-high, then dies down to very soft.

Would an [X] lover love this? If you like cotton candy scents, give this a try. It's different from the usual offerings. It's a LOT fruitier than something like Pink Sugar, and less musky/sexy.

Would an [X] hater love this? A cotton candy hater would probably find this too sweet. But if you hate Pink Sugar, you might think this is a little more refreshing and palatable.

Where am I? Ice skating rink, eating cotton candy.

Where would I wear this? This is definitely a daytime scent. It's not too sweet for work, and it would be great in the summer but the mint makes it nice for winter too.